PREDICTIONS: WWE ELIMINATION CHAMBER
It’s time for WWE’s final Premium Live Event before Wrestlemania, Elimination Chamber. This will no doubt be the biggest show in the history of this event. Similar to Backlash taking place from Puerto Rico last year, or selling out the O2 Arena in London for Money in The Bank, the company is once again going somewhere different to help boost one of their non-big four PLEs. This time it’s Perth Australia, where almost 50,000 fans will be in attendance at Opus Stadium. I love it when WWE goes international for something other than house shows. There’s always a great atmosphere created by fans who rarely get these kinds of events where they live. The only downside is, if you want to watch Elimination Chamber live, it starts at 5 am Eastern time. 4 am ET if you’re one of the sociopaths who like to watch the pre-show.
Barring any last-second announcements, the card features only four matches. There could’ve been five, but I guess my email recommending a Dingo Death Match accidentally went to Triple H’s spam folder. I understand a peacock subscription costs as much as Biggie Bag from Wendy’s, so the company doesn’t feel the kind of pressure to sell the show like they did during the Pay Per View era. This is also only the second time Australia has gotten a PLE, the first being 2018’s Super Showdown, so the tickets sold themselves. Plus, having two Chamber matches does take up a good chunk of time on the show. With all that said, really? Only four matches? They did add a little something extra by announcing a Grayson Waller Effect segment with Cody Rhodes as his guest. So at least the 50K in attendance will get to see one of the people maineventing WrestleMania.
As with most big pro wrestling events, Talent Alone’s gruesome twosome consisting of Adam and Myself are back with some spicy predictions. We only have three shows left as we continue our fight to be crowned The 2023-2024 Talent Alone Super Awesome Mega Pro Wrestling Genius. TASAMPWG for short. Unfortunately, this means time has officially started to run out for me. Going into the last show we did predictions for, AEW Worlds End, I found myself down 58-54 to Adam. Things didn’t go well for me during the show as I got doubled up in points and now find myself in a seven-point hole, 64-57. With only a few matches on this Saturday’s card, all with little mystery to the outcomes, the chances of gaining ground here appear slim. However, while I may be down, I refuse to be out. If there’s anything I learned from John Cena, it’s to Never Give Up and always apologize to China.
WWE Tag Team Championships:
The Judgement Day(Finn Balor and Damian Priest) vs Pete Dunne and Tyler Bate
ADAM: Quick cross-sport comparison here, is Tyler Bate the Jayson Tatum of Pro Wrestling? Wouldn’t it be kind of funny if Damian Priest just like continued to hold the Money in the Bank forever? That’s about all the analysis I have for this one folks.
THE JUDGEMENT DAY
MIKE: This is really the only match where I can make an argument for going against Adam with my pick. It’s starting to feel like Judgement Day has peaked and the time has come for the group to go their separate ways. Dom and Mami are a strong enough act on their own and, if we’re being honest, they’ve been carrying the group this whole time. Damien Priest can go give Rollins a taste of his own medicine and cash in his MITB contract at WrestleMania while Finn Balor spends all his time not eating carbs and doing an excessive amount of core workouts. Which works out perfectly for JD McDonagh, because he can just fill in for Balor whenever he was supposed to wrestle. He’ll be like Balor’s big headed understudy. The point is, give the belts to Dunne and Bate then have them go put on bangers with DIY.
PETER DUNNE AND TYLER BATE
Women’s World Championship:
Rhea Ripley(c) vs Nia Jax
MIKE: This is the best job WWE has done pushing Nia Jax since her time in NXT. Gee, I wonder why that is? She is also the perfect challenger for this situation. Rhea Ripley is already the most over woman in the company and a ready made mega face whenever they want to flip the switch. On top of that, this match is taking place in her home country. The term “Road Warrior pop” is going to be changed to “The Rhea Ripley pop” once she steps through the curtain on Saturday. Giving her a monster heel to overcome in this situation is exactly what you need. Get ready for plenty of replays of Ripley pulling off impressive power spots. Due to the short card, it’s obvious this and the tag match will be sandwiched between opening and closing chamber matches. Which is a shame. If it was up to me, the show would end with Mami celebrating after she successfully defended her title in the main event.
RHEA RIPLEY
ADAM: I would be more into this match if it was a kind of like “anything you can do I can do better” where Nia and Rhea took turns lifting eachother in more and more impressive ways but I think my contemporary, Mike Regan, hit the nail on the head. Does Rhea do a paused suplex with a few squats? Does she overhead press Nia? Will Nia break Rhea’s nose thus once again making a career for a foreigner in WWE? How about you do something for Americans once and a while Nia?
RHEA RIPLEY
Elimination Chamber Match (Winner challenges for the Women’s World Championship as WM40)
Becky Lynch vs Bianca Belair vs Liv Morgan vs Tiffany Stratton vs Naomi vs Raquel Rodriguez
ADAM: You know the nice thing about wrestling is that they can start setting shit up before the challenger is named and then name the challenger. Like imagine if we had a few moments during the NFL season where Lamar Jackson fronted on Nick Bosa and then the Ravens played the Niners in the Super Bowl? That’s pro wrestling baby, NFL just cant compete. Becky and Rhea have had a couple of run-ins recently and I’m pretty confident in saying that they’re setting up that match for Mania.
BECKY LYNCH
MIKE: Perth is located in West Australia, and a quick google search tells me that weed is illegal there. Just mentioning it so someone will give Liv Morgan a heads up. Becky vs Rhea is the biggest possible woman’s match WWE can do and Lynch is the challenger that feels the most WrestleMania level. Good news for Becky is that another quick google search tells me Australians generally like Irish people.
BECKY LYNCH
Elimination Chamber Match (Winner challenges for the World Heavyweight Championship at WM 40):
Drew McIntyre vs Randy Orton vs Bobby Lashley vs Kevin Owens vs Logan Paul vs LA Knight…YEAH!
MIKE: You have to imagine CM Punk would have been in this match, and won it, had he not gotten hurt. (Stay tuned for Adam taking shots at CM Punk below). Maybe if he was in this match, there would at least be a little mystery to who wins. However, with Punk out, all the attention on TV has been given to Drew McIntyre. It will be a huge surprise to see them go in a different direction. I will say though, I have really enjoyed this heel version of McIntyre. He’s a total dick, and I mean that as a compliment. McIntyre telling CM Punk he’s never been a spiritual person but he prayed for Punk to get injured is the greatest line a heel has said so far this year.
On a random note, with The Rock now a heel, any chance he’ll cross paths with LA Knight? I know it probably won’t happen, but it feels like it needs to.
DREW McINTYRE
ADAM: You know saying CM Punk would have done something had he not gotten hurt is a lot like saying that you’ll go to the gym if the sun doesn’t rise. Like we already know where this show is going so let’s stop putting qualifiers on there bud.
Doing the predictions this PLE kind of makes me realize that WWE phoned this one in, or more accurately punted, in preparation for a major Wrestlemania. I can’t imagine a world where Orton, Lashley, Owens or Paul win this match so that basically just leaves LA Knight, who creative is hoping we all eventually forget about, and Drew McIntyre, who creative is really making sure we remember. Fuck bud, seems a little too obvious don’t it?
DREW McINTYRE
